Lifestyle Failed enlightenemnt

[The Doctor]

I read some scriptures

thought it was gonna be like game tutorial just follow steps and escape samsara

popped progesterone and lied down tried detatchment meditation

Progesterone markedly increased libido , and i thought id use the insane horniness to defeat evil mara like avatar last airbender

but it failed and i fapped to one ugly monkey w big tits

then i realised my flaw, following this shit is unbecoming of me , muh initiation, i follow my own path and at best i take scriptures as passive guide , something to explore like a new magic spell or side quest when bored

then i did shaivite meditation, involved meditation on eating feces , being decapitated by spics etc. yielded some results but then i got horny again and jacked off again

key is not to rush it

 

[Deleted member 2463]

Dark enlightenment is all what you need

 

[The Doctor]

Dark enlightenment is all what you need

my guru said to avoid tantra as i already have evil tendencies

he said follow olympian ascesis (budhhism) or dry ascesis (shaivism)