Neet194012940
GUK 8-8008
- Jan 20, 2024
- 860
"NEETs," said @Lain, "are an endangered species".
@IGiveUp guffahed, spittle flying onto lains face. In the year 2028, this forum may have been called Neets.net, but because of the world's deteriorating economic situation, the noble race of NEETs had all but been completely wiped off the face of the earth. As such, the forum was graveyard and was gonna shut down unless a new userbase joined. It was rumoured that some NEETs still survived, in nicaragua, sequestered in their hidey holes and rotting, waiting for the return of NEETbux. If they could be induced to post - the forum would be saved.
Lain asked igiveup for a vehicle to try to make contact with them. Igiveup laughed. Neets, they piss on the floor! some of the more intelligent ones in bottles. filthy, filthy things. Sentient? that would be absurd.
No matter at all.
lain stole his cyber-whore sister's personal transport vehicle and headed to nicaragua
For a week, he had no luck tracking down the elusive NEET, until he had a chance encounter urban exploring in ruins.
***
@fries had bought a remote condo in nicaragua many years ago, and hadn't left until very recently. His supplies were still well stocked, enough to last pretty much indefinetly, but he had severely underestimated how much alcohol he would consume. He ran critically low on supplies and was forced to venture out. He didn't know where or what any of the streets were, so wandered into ruins.
Lain chased after him. Fries ran and hid. Seemingly losing him, he slunk back to his filthy neet cell.
Just as Lain planned. He was tracking his movements, and he brought his spy-gear. Thermal imaging. Telescopic microscope, long range camera, etc. Setting up in the bushes, he observed the NEET-thing in it's natural habitat. Jesus! look at the state of it's den. It was a miracle in and of itself that it hadn't burnt down until now. lain fancied himself a wildlife conservator.
***
The most important thing that would need to be observed is what the NEET-animal ate. He wasn't gonna repeat the mistake with feeding catepillars again. He took extensive notes on the creature while observing.
Hoarder house situation.
The NEET-animal seemed to have burrowed into a small cave inside his labyrinth, before lying down and rotting.
Fries made a critical mistake. He laid down too far away from his remaining store of food and alcohol, but didn't have the vitality required to move. Luckily, he spotted a bottle of vodka he drank the other week. There were a few drops left in the bottle, maybe it would be enough to get him through the day.
he would have to get up and go the the kitchen to fill it up with water. Impossible! Goddammit! at this rate he was going to go into convulsions and starve to death on the spot. Unless...
Fries eyed the most organzied section of his apartment, a pyramidal structure constructed out of plastic bottles. Originally, they had been all filled with urine, but somehow that didn't seem like an accurate description of the dark green concoctions at the interior and the base, with chunks of what was probably fungal colonies inside. He reached as far as he could, and managed to grab a bottle that was lying 1/3rd full, the rest long ago seeping onto the floor.
Fries seemed like it was making an effort to not pour the visible fungal spores into the glass bottle, but not enough to remove the flotsam that fell inside. Plugging the bottle closed with his thumb, he shook, then drank his concoction. Ugh! Lain cringed hard. NEET-animals are disgusting. Still, morality was largely subjective. Mankind couldn't be considered perfect by any means, it was only 100 years ago that -
The NEET-thing grabbed the carcass of a cockroach that was lying next to him and began to masticate on it. Piss, after all leaves quite a burning sensation in ones mouth. EWWWWWW! SICK!!! Lain threw up a little in his mouth.
Staying objective, lain noted: So... NEET is a creature that eats raw, dead cockroach and drinks urine
***
In the dead of night, lain conducted an extraction operation to capture the chinko creature. He put the miserable thing in a large cage in the basement of his rented airbnb. It didn't seem to do much. He had his doubts on it's sentience How much work would need to be done to turn this NEET-thing into an active poster?
Lain conducted a test. He made the thing look at him by turning its head. Lain pointed to text on his phone screen and then at the thing's head. It gave no sign of undersatnding. Lain pushed the book up close to its face and pointed at its mouth. No sign of recognition occurred in the eyes. It either wasn't going to read or it couldn't read.
He experimented some more. If these things could actually talk and read, then his plans were sure to work. He pulled up some pornography. Ah, success. There was a flicker of interest and recognition.
You would need a lot more than that if you wanted to make the NEET-thing into a good forum poster. Next, he would attempt to make it vocalize words. Lain brought in a container of water. Pouring some on it's hand, he said loudly. "WATER". "WATT - EEERRR" hellen keller style. Then he gesticulated at it's mouth, to try to induce it to talk. Finally it worked after he grabbed it's peanut skull forehead with one hand and mandible with the other.
sounds came out of the creatures oral orifice:
tranny is a cliquish standoffish creature who has never read poetry in his life and would call you a pseud if you’d mention something like the Lacanian notion of jouissance
gibberish! nevertheless, it was proven that it could vocalize. That's a start. Much work needed to be done. Lain fastened the chains and ropes, and went out to hunt for cockroaches to feed it with. Lucky thing, having a master as kind as I. It isn't easy to gather those, you know.
***
(after some time)
"Neet, does not live on uncooked cockroach parts and moldy urine" Lain just stood there staring at him. Then he sat down in the folding chair and looked at him some more. The NEET-animal looked back, then away, then back again when he mustered up the courage. although fleeting, the ravenous look in his eyes was unmistakable.
Fries lunged, a guttural noise being emitted from his mouth. I'm not a biologist, but the sharp things at the ends of their 4 main appenganges were out. Talons/claws ithink. That wasn't his only weapon. His fangs, ugly assymetrical things, were out, KLACK KLACK KLACK. He must've been a biter as a grubling. It took a bit of finesse, but lain managed to immobilize the NEET-animal, holding it by it's throat. Suddently, fries stopped struggling and went limp. Playing dead? No... he could tell by the shimmering in his eyes...
(not writing a sex scene)
Let's just say from that day forward, his daily training regimen of PDH (Pain-Drugs-Hypnosis) was supplanted by the superior method of PRDH. Lain figured that Mr. Doob (Leonward W. Doob: Propaganda (American director of WW2 propaganda) ommitted this method in the interest of good taste. Betcha he didn't know about pineapple (peaty).
***
@Riddler, unsure of whether to use a spork or straw, was poking at his work-allotted nutrient slurry - courtesy of prime minister J. Raj Trudeau, when the DM notification beamed into his retinas. It was from lain. Lain hadn't responded to his previous messages but anything was better than that slop - it just bubbled, a green splotch flying onto his shirt. Ugh!
Essentially, lain asked if his everyday activites in his nicuraguan dungeon made him gay. "I mean, I always wished more BWC cuck porn was posted". What exactly was so different about this scenario? Besides, it was a matter of the utmost medico-scientific interest, not to mention the survival of the forum. At the bottom, several files of the NEET-animal in various stages of undress was attached. If it was so embarrassing, why did he feel like he was sending a bragpost?
"Yeah, it's hard to put a finger on why there's a much greater degree of speciation in Neetmorphoid characteristics..." Riddler had read a thing or two about these creatures. They talk about them sometimes on X-eddit According to [PDF attached], the reason they pissed on the floor was a sort of paradoxical reaction to make them less desirable to the opposite sex. The funny thing about these creatures is that they only did so when they preceived themselves at the bottom of their social circle, IE if they already warded off the opposite sex. Don't quote me on this - but something about recessive genes?
It was decided that a demonstration of this NEET-animal's posting abilities would be livestreamed a week from now.
***
Lain peered through the cage on the basement window at what the NEET-animal was writing at his laptop - internet filters applied so only 4chan and Master Forums were accessable in case the chinko creature harboured any dreams of escape. It was working - he was writing a thread
??? bro, what is this. . Nowhere near a viable, show-casable product. Lain opened the dungeon door to deliver it's punishment. Something felt off. It was only as he came that he realized what. The NEET-thing was intentionally posting coal so he could be punished. He wanted this. Two more days until the demonstration. Fuck! .... speaking of things that could take the edge of the stress...
_______________________________________________________________________________________
@IGiveUp guffahed, spittle flying onto lains face. In the year 2028, this forum may have been called Neets.net, but because of the world's deteriorating economic situation, the noble race of NEETs had all but been completely wiped off the face of the earth. As such, the forum was graveyard and was gonna shut down unless a new userbase joined. It was rumoured that some NEETs still survived, in nicaragua, sequestered in their hidey holes and rotting, waiting for the return of NEETbux. If they could be induced to post - the forum would be saved.
Lain asked igiveup for a vehicle to try to make contact with them. Igiveup laughed. Neets, they piss on the floor! some of the more intelligent ones in bottles. filthy, filthy things. Sentient? that would be absurd.
No matter at all.
lain stole his cyber-whore sister's personal transport vehicle and headed to nicaragua
For a week, he had no luck tracking down the elusive NEET, until he had a chance encounter urban exploring in ruins.
***
@fries had bought a remote condo in nicaragua many years ago, and hadn't left until very recently. His supplies were still well stocked, enough to last pretty much indefinetly, but he had severely underestimated how much alcohol he would consume. He ran critically low on supplies and was forced to venture out. He didn't know where or what any of the streets were, so wandered into ruins.
Lain chased after him. Fries ran and hid. Seemingly losing him, he slunk back to his filthy neet cell.
Just as Lain planned. He was tracking his movements, and he brought his spy-gear. Thermal imaging. Telescopic microscope, long range camera, etc. Setting up in the bushes, he observed the NEET-thing in it's natural habitat. Jesus! look at the state of it's den. It was a miracle in and of itself that it hadn't burnt down until now. lain fancied himself a wildlife conservator.
***
The most important thing that would need to be observed is what the NEET-animal ate. He wasn't gonna repeat the mistake with feeding catepillars again. He took extensive notes on the creature while observing.
Hoarder house situation.
The NEET-animal seemed to have burrowed into a small cave inside his labyrinth, before lying down and rotting.
Fries made a critical mistake. He laid down too far away from his remaining store of food and alcohol, but didn't have the vitality required to move. Luckily, he spotted a bottle of vodka he drank the other week. There were a few drops left in the bottle, maybe it would be enough to get him through the day.
he would have to get up and go the the kitchen to fill it up with water. Impossible! Goddammit! at this rate he was going to go into convulsions and starve to death on the spot. Unless...
Fries eyed the most organzied section of his apartment, a pyramidal structure constructed out of plastic bottles. Originally, they had been all filled with urine, but somehow that didn't seem like an accurate description of the dark green concoctions at the interior and the base, with chunks of what was probably fungal colonies inside. He reached as far as he could, and managed to grab a bottle that was lying 1/3rd full, the rest long ago seeping onto the floor.
Fries seemed like it was making an effort to not pour the visible fungal spores into the glass bottle, but not enough to remove the flotsam that fell inside. Plugging the bottle closed with his thumb, he shook, then drank his concoction. Ugh! Lain cringed hard. NEET-animals are disgusting. Still, morality was largely subjective. Mankind couldn't be considered perfect by any means, it was only 100 years ago that -
The NEET-thing grabbed the carcass of a cockroach that was lying next to him and began to masticate on it. Piss, after all leaves quite a burning sensation in ones mouth. EWWWWWW! SICK!!! Lain threw up a little in his mouth.
Staying objective, lain noted: So... NEET is a creature that eats raw, dead cockroach and drinks urine
***
In the dead of night, lain conducted an extraction operation to capture the chinko creature. He put the miserable thing in a large cage in the basement of his rented airbnb. It didn't seem to do much. He had his doubts on it's sentience How much work would need to be done to turn this NEET-thing into an active poster?
Lain conducted a test. He made the thing look at him by turning its head. Lain pointed to text on his phone screen and then at the thing's head. It gave no sign of undersatnding. Lain pushed the book up close to its face and pointed at its mouth. No sign of recognition occurred in the eyes. It either wasn't going to read or it couldn't read.
He experimented some more. If these things could actually talk and read, then his plans were sure to work. He pulled up some pornography. Ah, success. There was a flicker of interest and recognition.
You would need a lot more than that if you wanted to make the NEET-thing into a good forum poster. Next, he would attempt to make it vocalize words. Lain brought in a container of water. Pouring some on it's hand, he said loudly. "WATER". "WATT - EEERRR" hellen keller style. Then he gesticulated at it's mouth, to try to induce it to talk. Finally it worked after he grabbed it's peanut skull forehead with one hand and mandible with the other.
sounds came out of the creatures oral orifice:
tranny is a cliquish standoffish creature who has never read poetry in his life and would call you a pseud if you’d mention something like the Lacanian notion of jouissance
gibberish! nevertheless, it was proven that it could vocalize. That's a start. Much work needed to be done. Lain fastened the chains and ropes, and went out to hunt for cockroaches to feed it with. Lucky thing, having a master as kind as I. It isn't easy to gather those, you know.
***
(after some time)
"Neet, does not live on uncooked cockroach parts and moldy urine" Lain just stood there staring at him. Then he sat down in the folding chair and looked at him some more. The NEET-animal looked back, then away, then back again when he mustered up the courage. although fleeting, the ravenous look in his eyes was unmistakable.
Fries lunged, a guttural noise being emitted from his mouth. I'm not a biologist, but the sharp things at the ends of their 4 main appenganges were out. Talons/claws ithink. That wasn't his only weapon. His fangs, ugly assymetrical things, were out, KLACK KLACK KLACK. He must've been a biter as a grubling. It took a bit of finesse, but lain managed to immobilize the NEET-animal, holding it by it's throat. Suddently, fries stopped struggling and went limp. Playing dead? No... he could tell by the shimmering in his eyes...
(not writing a sex scene)
Let's just say from that day forward, his daily training regimen of PDH (Pain-Drugs-Hypnosis) was supplanted by the superior method of PRDH. Lain figured that Mr. Doob (Leonward W. Doob: Propaganda (American director of WW2 propaganda) ommitted this method in the interest of good taste. Betcha he didn't know about pineapple (peaty).
***
@Riddler, unsure of whether to use a spork or straw, was poking at his work-allotted nutrient slurry - courtesy of prime minister J. Raj Trudeau, when the DM notification beamed into his retinas. It was from lain. Lain hadn't responded to his previous messages but anything was better than that slop - it just bubbled, a green splotch flying onto his shirt. Ugh!
Essentially, lain asked if his everyday activites in his nicuraguan dungeon made him gay. "I mean, I always wished more BWC cuck porn was posted". What exactly was so different about this scenario? Besides, it was a matter of the utmost medico-scientific interest, not to mention the survival of the forum. At the bottom, several files of the NEET-animal in various stages of undress was attached. If it was so embarrassing, why did he feel like he was sending a bragpost?
"Yeah, it's hard to put a finger on why there's a much greater degree of speciation in Neetmorphoid characteristics..." Riddler had read a thing or two about these creatures. They talk about them sometimes on X-eddit According to [PDF attached], the reason they pissed on the floor was a sort of paradoxical reaction to make them less desirable to the opposite sex. The funny thing about these creatures is that they only did so when they preceived themselves at the bottom of their social circle, IE if they already warded off the opposite sex. Don't quote me on this - but something about recessive genes?
It was decided that a demonstration of this NEET-animal's posting abilities would be livestreamed a week from now.
***
Lain peered through the cage on the basement window at what the NEET-animal was writing at his laptop - internet filters applied so only 4chan and Master Forums were accessable in case the chinko creature harboured any dreams of escape. It was working - he was writing a thread
??? bro, what is this
. . Nowhere near a viable, show-casable product. Lain opened the dungeon door to deliver it's punishment. Something felt off. It was only as he came that he realized what. The NEET-thing was intentionally posting coal so he could be punished. He wanted this. Two more days until the demonstration. Fuck! .... speaking of things that could take the edge of the stress..._______________________________________________________________________________________
