Discussion Giving in to darkness

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Lord_hierophantūs

Lord_hierophantūs

it repenteth me not
Dec 27, 2023
736
You may or may not have heard in your respective cultures that there are certain practices which you simply should never participate in. In America the primary taboo is black magick or anything have to do with demons and the devil, for other nations it may be the warding off of evil spirits or putting up charms, but it makes you wonder who the people who do engage in such practices are?

At one point in time I wanted to be a Satanist and to give you an idea of what it was about. Satanism is the belief that the ego driven self is God on earth, that morality is relative, that the natural law is fang and claw. I wanted to be one because I wanted power, but who I am or who I think I am did not permit me other wise, I would fight with myself daily on this matter, but at the same time, the taint of black evil poison slowly (as I allowed it) to seep into the pores of my flesh, however this was slow to take hold of me.

I would listen to Anton Lavey's Satanic hyme of the empire or listen to the ritual music which he had made in vinyl form of his time. I took pleasure in wanting to act like a satanist and wearing the style of clothing and garments of one, but I could bring myself to do it, though the best I had was the Satanic bible and the music (side note I listened to the bands of that satanic genre, but to me it was childish). The more I got into it some occurrences did happen though they were small. My fist was hearing Anton Lavey say the enochian keys as I was half-asleep it scared me, but I was able to sooth myself. The last experience however brought such fear in me that I cried that night and threw the satanic bible away.

A few weeks later I had a dream, there was this house and there was three windows with three people within it, I appear in the room once and the room was dirty and had a odd feeling, the second time I appear and I saw that there was a bag, opening it there was satanic symbolism, I said "who's was this?" and a voice replied "someone who wanted power", I leave the room and before I appear in the room for the third and last time, I was in a room with people as we were there one person said "guys did you see that. the bag moved on its own!" I
immediately said "we have to throw these away!", I appear in the room for the third and last time as I am there a terrible presence comes over me, I turn to the right and there is a room connected to the room I'm in, and as I go towards it, towards the window, I say "Jesus Christ be with me this moment" and a gong sound is made and I awoke.

In this world there are behaviors and world views which will cause hell and havoc, sometimes I still think or see those satanic symbols, but I don't ever go back out of fear that if I should ever open that door, the actual consequences will surely take me away without hassle.


Have you guys ever felt like giving in the philosophy of might or hatred that it may consume you?
 
HeavyWeaponsGuy

HeavyWeaponsGuy

I'm actually a soldier main
Mar 1, 2024
63
Supernatural definitely exists, though I have not experienced what you did.
Yes, I've felt many times to give in and "give up" my soul (which isn't a real thing, it's a trick to trap you. they are powerless against god) to hurt the people who wronged me.
Spiritually I am very weak, I'm not going to buff myself as a strong willed individual. I definitely get lied to all the time. Mostly by myself.
In these times demons and the satan don't even have to lift a finger. People do their job to each other without anything in return
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

Goonin forward, troon a new page
Aug 3, 2023
2,138
Well, I definitely did reach a low like that but nothing so fancy or sophisticated. I simply wanted to sell my soul to the Islamic devil IBLISS and escape my poor Life. And By soul, my understanding was not like a movie where some ball of light is exchanged for worldly pleasures. From what I understood I was to perform ritual sacrifices and denounce all faith in God along with absolute submission to any spirits who wish to inhabit my body. I reached such lows that this deal sounded preferable to my current life. I was told not to shower for months and never clean myself to allow a better communications with these spirits. The old woman who wanted to teach me black magic SIHR supposedly knew how to contact them. I was always hesitant and suspicious of her and if she's just a charltan but she did things I can not explain to this day.
 
Last edited:
Moondust

Moondust

NEET
Nov 8, 2023
5,949
Well, I definitely did reach a low like that but nothing so fancy or sophisticated. Oli simple wanted to sell my soul to the Islamic devil IBLISS and escape my poor Life. By soul my understanding was not like a movie where some ball of light is exchanged for worldly pleasures. From what I understood I was to perform ritual sacrifices and denounce all faith in God along with absolute submission to any spirits who wish to inhabit my body. I reached such lows that this deal sounded preferable to my current life. I was told not to shower for months and never clean myself to allow a better communications with these spirits. The old woman who wanted to teach me black magic SIHR supposedly knew how to contact them. I was always hesitant and suspicious of her and if she's just a charltan but she did things I can not explain to this day.
Understandable ive considered doing affirmations and trying out magic to make my crypto bags grow 🤣. Idk tho i know its all bs until proven otherwise so i never cared to. I was just desperate

Ive even tried praying recently for anxiety and didnt notice any improve so i stopped
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

Goonin forward, troon a new page
Aug 3, 2023
2,138
Understandable ive considered doing affirmations and trying out magic to make my crypto bags grow 🤣. Idk tho i know its all bs until proven otherwise so i never cared to. I was just desperate
What's your criteria for believing in it?. I can't say I care or cared much for proving it or disproving. Some times you reach a low where everything including your beliefs and set of principles and even the truth becomes only a means to an end. That tunnel vision moment where you just see undeniable proof and just shrug off cuz 'who gives a fuck?'.
 
Moondust

Moondust

NEET
Nov 8, 2023
5,949
What's your criteria for believing in it?. I can't say I care or cared much for proving it or disproving. Some times you reach a low where everything including your beliefs and set of principles and even the truth becomes only a means to an end. That tunnel vision moment where you just see undeniable proof and just shrug off cuz 'who gives a fuck?'.
Uhhhh common sense evidence? Lmao its not that complicated 🤣
 
Moondust

Moondust

NEET
Nov 8, 2023
5,949
If u dont care if its been proven just tell yourself theres an all powerful fairy that wil give u everything u want tomorrow lmao.
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

Goonin forward, troon a new page
Aug 3, 2023
2,138
Uhhhh common sense evidence? Lmao its not that complicated 🤣
That's a vague description. What are you looking for, what kind of evidence will fit your common sense? Give me something to work with here. You can't expect the subject of metaphysics to apply to the physical like it's a normal everyday occurrence that can be rationalised on a whim
 
Moondust

Moondust

NEET
Nov 8, 2023
5,949
That's a vague description. What are you looking for, what kind of evidence will fit your common sense? Give me something to work with here. You can't expect the subject of metaphysics to apply to the physical like it's a normal everyday occurrence that can be rationalised on a whim
Obviously obfuscating so you can have irrational beliefs. Again, even dumb people know what i mean. Can it be observed? Measured? Logicaly extrapolated based on stuff thats already been measured/observed? Jesus lol. Stop arguing in bad faith

And if it cant be rationalized then no conclusions can be drawn on it, its all subjective
 
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