S
Stim
NEET
- Apr 21, 2024
- 64
It’s hard to begin writing this, given the context required to explain everything.
I’m bothered by the fact that I’m in a position in life where I can’t fully express my thoughts or insights, despite having some educated experiences. For instance, I hesitated to click on a link to an article because I knew it would lead to a 110-page PDF file that needed downloading—something I wouldn’t immediately read. Still, moments after recognizing that, I clicked the link anyway.
I also found it frustrating that I commented on a Reddit post linking the article. My comment mentioned the "read aloud" feature, knowing I’d probably lose focus while listening. Yet, I didn’t bring up that the article lacked clear examples of potential applications during my first read. Hours later, I added a second comment addressing this. Two comments on a years-old Reddit post with only a few other outdated replies—it felt redundant, perhaps influenced by my upbringing, siblings, and past experiences instilling a kind of paranoia in me.
It’s valid to ask: Would being recruited as a teenager or actively working toward that have been a net positive for me? I’ve never had any significant dreams or ambitions. As a kid, I didn’t worry about not having one, but I was always aware of this absence. Unfortunately, no one pressured me to prepare for adulthood; I was mostly left to my own devices.
These thoughts floated in my mind long before discovering that article. It’s fascinating—and a bit surreal—that non-invasive eye drop solutions for vision, and even laser eye surgery, which could technically be considered enhancements, were mentioned in that PDF. I didn’t read much beyond noticing that reference.
Months ago, I had a funny shower thought about a piece of propaganda with bold fonts advertising a biotech service enabling the 77% of people to pass some "recruitment bar." I joked that it could easily be spun as a scam. It made me think about how preparing your body through rigorous exercise can feel futile, yet the commercial market for benign enhancements like improved eyesight or internal modifications is more plausible and acceptable, even if unconventional.
I didn’t have these types of thoughts before this month, and I doubt I would’ve if I hadn’t “dropped the ball” in high school. Back then, I let myself become neurotic, and I wasn’t even aware of trade schools or career options. I didn’t seek advice or explore paths on Reddit. One Reddit post, likely from r/findapath, sticks in my mind—a user asked something like, “Why didn’t it ever click for you to get out sooner?” That resonated with me.
My current Reddit account feels like a cesspool, filled with random stories that lack context or visuals. It’s also a sad reminder of wasted years, as the account’s creation date marks the passage of time.
I don’t even know where to begin learning creative writing or illustration. I’ve saved Reddit comments with resources but haven’t acted on them. I don’t see myself practicing these skills consistently, and my lack of experience holds me back.
I’ve been a NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training) for five years, but this wasn’t the life I envisioned. Maybe if career paths had been properly advertised to me, I wouldn’t have ended up here, compounding mistakes and feeling directionless.
Recently, I saw a one-hour documentary about Blue Bloods celebrating its final season. It struck me how long the series has been running and how shows like these can mark the passage of time. It made me wonder if time feels like it’s slipping more quickly when viewed through that lens.
Looking back, I regret the choices I didn’t make to secure a better future. I even asked my mom recently if my high school ever sent out any career-oriented mail or advertising. If not, then it says a lot about how kids are left to rely solely on the internet. I also regret not paying attention to in-demand job fields back then.
The job market news is another thing. Even in-demand fields don’t guarantee success—there are only so many positions, and employers hold the final say. But maybe I’m just stuck in a rut. Still, having hope and confidence in a future career might have been better for my personal development. At least it would’ve kept me focused and prevented some of the neuroticism I’ve dealt with.
It’s sad to think that I never learned practical skills, like paying taxes or understanding voting processes, during school. My mom and I recently discussed this—she mentioned a Reddit comment about students falling asleep in those classes anyway.
I’ve also reflected on a strange encounter with my high school principal, which led to a discussion about my sibling’s odd, out-of-place behavior during conversations.
Ultimately, I wouldn’t be living this stagnant life, rotting away without a future, if I’d experienced the right guidance as a teenager.
