Venting Nothing seems to work anymore and the pressure keeps squeezing on me

Polar-Z

Polar-Z

so tiresome
Aug 3, 2023
2,775
feelings drowning GIF by WE tv
I'm 26 and only getting older. I no longer know if it was by chance or choice that my Life lead me this far. And I do no care.

Feels like I'm trapped in a boat, the boat is sinking ever so slowly. There's no rescue on the horizon. So I smoke them cigarettes and stare at them old family albums and yearly school photos and I wonder what could've been.
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

so tiresome
Aug 3, 2023
2,775
Don't lose hope, brother. Giving up won't reduce your suffering.
There is no hope but you make your peace with that because the ride won't stop just because you're sick of it. Life keeps going despite your position within. And you can either accept that or lose your mind bitchin about it.
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

so tiresome
Aug 3, 2023
2,775
In gonna smoke my second pack today. It feels like a repetitive cycle. But even so we have to get used to it. Remember we arent born winners at all. This is the life that chose us. We never chose this life
Kek same here. Just bought a new one. Feels good for a sec. Cancer gonna suck though.
 
Thadman

Thadman

NEET
Sep 6, 2023
4,942
That part tbh one day you're an innocent boy with hopes and dreams next you're a man broken permanently by years of abused doggery
Thinking back at it, I somewhat expected young me to turn out like this. As a child I didn't have much hopes or dreams like most of my peers, all I cared about was playing on the xbox or binge watching youtube.

I was under the impression that most kids my age were doing the same, and not hanging out or having a fun time with each other outside of school so it was a shocker when neighborhood kids first invited me to hang out with them in 4th grade
 
Polar-Z

Polar-Z

so tiresome
Aug 3, 2023
2,775
Thinking back at it, I somewhat expected young me to turn out like this. As a child I didn't have much hopes or dreams like most of my peers, all I cared about was playing on the xbox or binge watching youtube.

I was under the impression that most kids my age were doing the same, and not hanging out or having a fun time with each other outside of school so it was a shocker when neighborhood kids first invited me to hang out with them in 4th grade
I wish I was as elaborate as you. Funny thing genes ain't it. Aren't you like 19 or something... yet so much more introspective than I ever was.

Really goes to show you the subjectivity of it all. Your place in life is meaningless. Doesn't matter how old or how much you struggled. All it takes is a simple recombination for someone to mog you into oblivion. I was never able to make my peace with that part tbh. Seeing my cousins and shit. All decades younger than me yet so much more successful and mature.

Worst part was always the gaslighting. Making you think it was your choice all along.
 
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