frightfulcel
Such deceit, such mischief hsssssk
- Sep 9, 2022
- 813
Just to say I'm sorry for not posting on here for a while. While I've been lurking I haven't been posting. I really regret that given this is the only community I've ever felt welcomed in. Lately I've been occupied with some copes but I feel that I need to post here more as a sense of belonging.
Warning: Wall of text
I'm a really emotional person as in I can't let things go easily so if things happen they affect me for a long time. I always feel like I moved past my .is drama but I'm just coping. I understand that you may go "its just the internet" or "its not real life", I understand but the issue is that I was in a vunerable point of my life at the time and I feel I was backstabbed/betrayed viciously. It still gets to me years later, which I guess is what they would want but its not like I can turn off my emotions to spite them.
Backstory: My father put me on anti depressants because he thought I was crazy. I don't remember why I took them but I did and this slowly made me go manic. I use to be a lot more chill on .is but the antidepressnats made me sound like a crazy person. I would also get drunk at the time as back then given I was in my late teens my body could still handle alcohol (unlike now). I would have fights on that site with people over the black pill, or worldviews etc. and maybe that didn't do me any favours. I regret doing it because even people that were nice to me I may have gotten into fights with which I regret. However given I was on SSRI'S which change your behaviour its understandable.
I was in a lot of emotional pain but I spammed on .is as a coping mechanism but a lot of users didn't like that and thought I was doing it to get higher in the heiarchy or something. Basically eventually I joined discord and was shocked to learn that many users spent more time on there than on the forum. All this was going on in the background outside the forum which made me realize that people use these places to socialize more than the forum. Given I have autism like many on that site I was more prone to posting on this forum instead of discord. I told someone while drunk about how a girl would grab my dick to fuck with me given I was retarded etc. and honestly I thought this guy was ok but honestly looking back he would attack lots of users constantly on the forum. He then got angry at me and kept calling my posts "low iq" until he decided to share screenshots of what I said on discord to stir up hatred against me and get me banned.
I feel like I was gaslighted that I wasn't an incel or something because people kept saying because I was 6"0 I was a normie. I kind of accepted it and decided to essentially just tell the admins about the situation and get a ban. I did come back later on because I decided that I was still an incel but the admins banned me because many of these users got really angry that I was back and some even threatened to delete their accounts if I didn't leave. Looking back its understandable given I got into fights with them while manic on SSRI's however I feel like what they were doing was unreasonable.
A few things happened when the guy spread the screenshots out of context around discord. The first thing is users started saying they wanted to "kill themselves" over being mogged or something. I then had users PM me telling me that they thought I was a trucel and they were emotionally hurt by it and I had to explain to them the situation but I don't think they really believed it. I then had people making memes about how I should commit suicide given they knew I was on edge so they used that against me given they now had ragefuel that I was a "fakecel". I believe people even made threads shitting on me. Nobody really listened to my side of the story. I'm going to admit that this hurt me a lot because I had invested so much emotional energy into that site and made connections and seeing the community shit on me like that despite the fact that it was out of context hurt me a lot and it still hurts me now even though most of those users are long gone.
There were good users though. Some questioned the screenshots and others said that maybe something happened to me for me to end up on that site. Others went against the people showing the memes encouraging me to commit suicide stating that they don't know my situation or the context. A lot of those users were "neet" type users like on here with anime profile pictures etc. and in hindsight I feel like I belong here the most. I would like to thank those users for standing up for me despite the way the guy who leaked our chat made me out to be this evil fakecel larper guy but I was banned so can't. Given the turnover rate on this sites they have likely left.
I had a looksmax account that I made a few months prior so I went onto that. I made threads saying that I regret what happened on .is and that I was sorry. I then had to learn to get along with people who were not aligned with a 4chan/incel culture rather a PSL culture. At first my postmaxxing didn't sit well with them but over time I believe that I began to get along well with them despite the fact that a lot of them were not incels. Infact a lot of the users I got on with the best were not incels and I think this was due to the fact that they were more chilled out and didn't take these spaces on the internet as seriously. I think because there was no competition to be the biggest loser things were more chilled out. While I got into a lot of arguments on there because I was in a bad space of mind the userbase was a lot more forgiving and just saw me as someone in a bad space instead of a troll or attention seeker. The only issue that remained was that I was still an incel/neet and didn't fit in with everyone there in the sense that I liked them as people but my self improving was limited to my chronic fatigue and brain fog.
A user who harassed me came onto looksmax and made a thread, I can't remember what it was. I then told him that he persecuted me back on .is and that he should "f off" or something (being emotional). I then wake up and browse .is and am yet again witchhunted. Some user claims that he communited suicide (larp) and listed about 10 users who insulted him on the thread. I was extremely angry that whole day because the same person who witch hunted and persecuted me now is larping that he commited suicide over a looksmax post so he can get people to witch hunt me (and the other people of that thread) on looksmax. To me this was extremely unfair and hypocritical. He eventually logged back on and posted all the names himself to try to get people to go after them but given it was on .is it didn't really matter as nobody was going to go after people on an entirley different forum for shitposting in a thread. This user in question eventually told everyone that he wasn't really an incel which enrages me given that I went through all of that while this person wasn't an incel the whole time and was projecting that onto me.
My friend on .is secertly conspired against me and went to another user to try to "take me down" and dox me. He had nothing to lose so was willing to try anything. He teamed up with another user to try to build up my trust. The first thing he did was ask me if I had a "girlfriend". I told him that I didn't then he told me that he had a girlfriend once (which was true, he wasn't an incel). I then told him that I was "gropped" and that the screenshots were out of context. He then screenshotted that and sent it to the other guy and the mods on .is in an attempt to get more info against me. He then started to "love bomb" me to get my trust and I suspected nothing. I remember when the guy who pretended to commit suicide larped my friend said "what did he do, tell me more info please". After reading that I became sus of sending my friend any personal information and I was right. At one point he tried to use a IP logger against me but it failed. His friend would shit on my on .is until he ascended then he deleted everything. Despite shitting on me on the forum this individual would still praise certain fakecels for ascending and call them "slayers" so he seems like a hypocrite. This left my friend essentially spying on me for 0 reason given that the drama had moved on from then and the guy he teamed up with to dox me had left the community. There was a 3rd guy I believe whom I know 0 about who also deleted everything and became anymous again. I believe he met my friend on 4chan and had an email exchange going with him however he did the same thing as the other guy.
The person in question would constantly delete everything (discord, account etc) then come back in loops. He would even claim he was a female at times to rub it in. He sent me his personal information once such as his passport, place of work etc. to gain my trust and a gamble to make me send personal information myself out of trust. He would always come back and give me reasons he was like this (family etc) and I would always be chill and welcome him back no questions asked. I related a lot to him and wanted to make him my buddy so to speak but he was always on edge. As time went on we would talk all day and exchange huge swarths of text with eachother. Eventually I sent him some personal stuff and as soon as he got that he told me that he betrayed me a year ago. I felt a lot of emotional pain given that I thought he was one of the chill people who I believed was on my side. I unadded him because he continued to fuck with me. I did add him back later though because he was sorry but I am still annoyed that he basically witchhunted me for a year straight then revealed it as soon as I sent personal information and he had leverage.
I then met a user who this guy had basically doxxed and ghosted. However this guy was a fakecel who literally told me he had women offer him sex. He was a big rugby player who was high t and gymmaxxed. He gaslighted me to self improve and eventually just deleted everything and just left the forum all together. Someone on .is crossposted on of my threads on here earlier this year and he trashedtalked me for some reason. Meanwhile hes still posting on .is despite being an actual fakecel.
Summery: Its cringe to hold onto stuff that happened years ago however I still feel it was unfair and an injustice given the users who witchhunted me weren't even incels. I understand societys contempt towards incels a lot better now given I was on the opposing side of their anger/rage being lead on by fakecels. I'm not expecting anyone to really read this its more of a diary/journal. How can I move past this?
Warning: Wall of text
I'm a really emotional person as in I can't let things go easily so if things happen they affect me for a long time. I always feel like I moved past my .is drama but I'm just coping. I understand that you may go "its just the internet" or "its not real life", I understand but the issue is that I was in a vunerable point of my life at the time and I feel I was backstabbed/betrayed viciously. It still gets to me years later, which I guess is what they would want but its not like I can turn off my emotions to spite them.
Backstory: My father put me on anti depressants because he thought I was crazy. I don't remember why I took them but I did and this slowly made me go manic. I use to be a lot more chill on .is but the antidepressnats made me sound like a crazy person. I would also get drunk at the time as back then given I was in my late teens my body could still handle alcohol (unlike now). I would have fights on that site with people over the black pill, or worldviews etc. and maybe that didn't do me any favours. I regret doing it because even people that were nice to me I may have gotten into fights with which I regret. However given I was on SSRI'S which change your behaviour its understandable.
I was in a lot of emotional pain but I spammed on .is as a coping mechanism but a lot of users didn't like that and thought I was doing it to get higher in the heiarchy or something. Basically eventually I joined discord and was shocked to learn that many users spent more time on there than on the forum. All this was going on in the background outside the forum which made me realize that people use these places to socialize more than the forum. Given I have autism like many on that site I was more prone to posting on this forum instead of discord. I told someone while drunk about how a girl would grab my dick to fuck with me given I was retarded etc. and honestly I thought this guy was ok but honestly looking back he would attack lots of users constantly on the forum. He then got angry at me and kept calling my posts "low iq" until he decided to share screenshots of what I said on discord to stir up hatred against me and get me banned.
I feel like I was gaslighted that I wasn't an incel or something because people kept saying because I was 6"0 I was a normie. I kind of accepted it and decided to essentially just tell the admins about the situation and get a ban. I did come back later on because I decided that I was still an incel but the admins banned me because many of these users got really angry that I was back and some even threatened to delete their accounts if I didn't leave. Looking back its understandable given I got into fights with them while manic on SSRI's however I feel like what they were doing was unreasonable.
A few things happened when the guy spread the screenshots out of context around discord. The first thing is users started saying they wanted to "kill themselves" over being mogged or something. I then had users PM me telling me that they thought I was a trucel and they were emotionally hurt by it and I had to explain to them the situation but I don't think they really believed it. I then had people making memes about how I should commit suicide given they knew I was on edge so they used that against me given they now had ragefuel that I was a "fakecel". I believe people even made threads shitting on me. Nobody really listened to my side of the story. I'm going to admit that this hurt me a lot because I had invested so much emotional energy into that site and made connections and seeing the community shit on me like that despite the fact that it was out of context hurt me a lot and it still hurts me now even though most of those users are long gone.
There were good users though. Some questioned the screenshots and others said that maybe something happened to me for me to end up on that site. Others went against the people showing the memes encouraging me to commit suicide stating that they don't know my situation or the context. A lot of those users were "neet" type users like on here with anime profile pictures etc. and in hindsight I feel like I belong here the most. I would like to thank those users for standing up for me despite the way the guy who leaked our chat made me out to be this evil fakecel larper guy but I was banned so can't. Given the turnover rate on this sites they have likely left.
I had a looksmax account that I made a few months prior so I went onto that. I made threads saying that I regret what happened on .is and that I was sorry. I then had to learn to get along with people who were not aligned with a 4chan/incel culture rather a PSL culture. At first my postmaxxing didn't sit well with them but over time I believe that I began to get along well with them despite the fact that a lot of them were not incels. Infact a lot of the users I got on with the best were not incels and I think this was due to the fact that they were more chilled out and didn't take these spaces on the internet as seriously. I think because there was no competition to be the biggest loser things were more chilled out. While I got into a lot of arguments on there because I was in a bad space of mind the userbase was a lot more forgiving and just saw me as someone in a bad space instead of a troll or attention seeker. The only issue that remained was that I was still an incel/neet and didn't fit in with everyone there in the sense that I liked them as people but my self improving was limited to my chronic fatigue and brain fog.
A user who harassed me came onto looksmax and made a thread, I can't remember what it was. I then told him that he persecuted me back on .is and that he should "f off" or something (being emotional). I then wake up and browse .is and am yet again witchhunted. Some user claims that he communited suicide (larp) and listed about 10 users who insulted him on the thread. I was extremely angry that whole day because the same person who witch hunted and persecuted me now is larping that he commited suicide over a looksmax post so he can get people to witch hunt me (and the other people of that thread) on looksmax. To me this was extremely unfair and hypocritical. He eventually logged back on and posted all the names himself to try to get people to go after them but given it was on .is it didn't really matter as nobody was going to go after people on an entirley different forum for shitposting in a thread. This user in question eventually told everyone that he wasn't really an incel which enrages me given that I went through all of that while this person wasn't an incel the whole time and was projecting that onto me.
My friend on .is secertly conspired against me and went to another user to try to "take me down" and dox me. He had nothing to lose so was willing to try anything. He teamed up with another user to try to build up my trust. The first thing he did was ask me if I had a "girlfriend". I told him that I didn't then he told me that he had a girlfriend once (which was true, he wasn't an incel). I then told him that I was "gropped" and that the screenshots were out of context. He then screenshotted that and sent it to the other guy and the mods on .is in an attempt to get more info against me. He then started to "love bomb" me to get my trust and I suspected nothing. I remember when the guy who pretended to commit suicide larped my friend said "what did he do, tell me more info please". After reading that I became sus of sending my friend any personal information and I was right. At one point he tried to use a IP logger against me but it failed. His friend would shit on my on .is until he ascended then he deleted everything. Despite shitting on me on the forum this individual would still praise certain fakecels for ascending and call them "slayers" so he seems like a hypocrite. This left my friend essentially spying on me for 0 reason given that the drama had moved on from then and the guy he teamed up with to dox me had left the community. There was a 3rd guy I believe whom I know 0 about who also deleted everything and became anymous again. I believe he met my friend on 4chan and had an email exchange going with him however he did the same thing as the other guy.
The person in question would constantly delete everything (discord, account etc) then come back in loops. He would even claim he was a female at times to rub it in. He sent me his personal information once such as his passport, place of work etc. to gain my trust and a gamble to make me send personal information myself out of trust. He would always come back and give me reasons he was like this (family etc) and I would always be chill and welcome him back no questions asked. I related a lot to him and wanted to make him my buddy so to speak but he was always on edge. As time went on we would talk all day and exchange huge swarths of text with eachother. Eventually I sent him some personal stuff and as soon as he got that he told me that he betrayed me a year ago. I felt a lot of emotional pain given that I thought he was one of the chill people who I believed was on my side. I unadded him because he continued to fuck with me. I did add him back later though because he was sorry but I am still annoyed that he basically witchhunted me for a year straight then revealed it as soon as I sent personal information and he had leverage.
I then met a user who this guy had basically doxxed and ghosted. However this guy was a fakecel who literally told me he had women offer him sex. He was a big rugby player who was high t and gymmaxxed. He gaslighted me to self improve and eventually just deleted everything and just left the forum all together. Someone on .is crossposted on of my threads on here earlier this year and he trashedtalked me for some reason. Meanwhile hes still posting on .is despite being an actual fakecel.
Summery: Its cringe to hold onto stuff that happened years ago however I still feel it was unfair and an injustice given the users who witchhunted me weren't even incels. I understand societys contempt towards incels a lot better now given I was on the opposing side of their anger/rage being lead on by fakecels. I'm not expecting anyone to really read this its more of a diary/journal. How can I move past this?
